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читать дальшеChapter 7: Moving On?
Tamao stood alone as she waited nervously, feeling like her heart could jump out of her. And her fingers fidgeted to keep her from pacing. She wished she hadn't come so early. She thought it would help her get ready but it seems to be doing the opposite. She took another deep breath to calm down, but it didn't really help.
"Tamao!" The called girl looked up and could already feel herself blush. Horohoro came running over and panted for air when he stopped. She couldn't turn back now. Once the bluenette finally caught his breath, he looked at her with his big grin.
"Was I late?"
"Um, n-no."
"Cool, I'm actually on time for something. So what'd you wanna talk about?" Tamao forced a giggle even though she felt like her stomach was twisted. She really didn't know how to start so it was best to just say it.
"Horohoro-kun, I, um I..."
"What's up, Tamao?"
"I-I...um...I...I love you!" After so much stuttering, which embarassed her too much, Tamao quickly told her message. She suddenly felt uplifted but immediately felt another weight fall on her. Horohoro stood dumbfounded, stunned at her sudden confession. And then he looked bewildered, and Tamao's heart began to sink deeply.
"I thought you loved Yoh."
"You're my closest friend who's a boy, and always comforted and made me happy when I was crushed about Yoh-kun. I eventually got over him, or rather say gave him up, but then I realized..." Tamao's cheeks turned redder and Horohoro's turned a bit pink. But he couldn't quite give an answer. That hurt Tamao a bit and she held back tears. Right before those tears fell, Horohoro spoke again.
"Three days."
"Eh?"
"Give me three days. I'll answer you then, I promise."
"...Ok." And so, Horohoro thought about it for those three days. His heart is what made him so lost. He loved Ren, not Tamao, and would choose the Chinese over her. So why didn't he? Because he was scared. Though he didn't really love Tamao, it was true that she's the closest friend out of every girl he knew. He at least knew that she loved him so choosing her wouldn't really be a bad thing. While Ren on the other hand, he didn't know if the Chinese loved him back. Choosing Ren would mean taking a chance. A risk to being broken. And who knows, maybe by giving Tamao a chance, Horohoro might grow to love her back. And so, three days later...
"Tamao?"
"Yes, Horohoro-kun?"
"I'm...sorry. I can't"
Horohoro leaned back on a tree as he looked back on that time, about two years ago. For a while, he thought about going to Tamao. For a while, it seemed right. But then the night before meeting her again, he realized it's wrong. It happened when he thought about Tamao's placement. He soon saw that she was somewhere he was trying to run from. Unlike him who was trying to go the easy way out, Tamao was facing her fear. Like him, she knew well of the chance of rejection. But still, she confronted Horohoro with her true feelings and didn't try to run away with dishonesty. And though he knew he was going to hurt her, Horohoro turned her down. But his eyes were opened to do what Tamao did; comfront Ren with his heart.
"Horohoro-kun!" Horohoro was quickly pulled out of his deep thoughts as Tamao came to him.
"Gomen-nasai. Did I make you wait?" The girl asked apologetically. But Horohoro smiled in return.
"Nah, not at all."
XxXxXx AT THE CAKE PLACE XxXxXx
The two sat at a table with cake in front of both of them. Tamao ordered a piece of chocolate cake and so did Horohoro along with cheese cake, strawberry short cake, and apple pie. As they ate, Tamao couldn't help but giggle at how excitedly Horohoro munched down. His child-like manner was always so cute, she couldn't resist. Plus, it always made her feel rewarded when he ate like that with food she cooked for him. Those moments highlighted even her darkest days.
"Did I do something funny?" Horohoro asked as he paused from eating and looked at Tamao. She shook her head in answer and held back giggles when she noticed a bit of cream at the corner of his mouth. She grabbed a napkin and gently wiped if off.
"No, but you look funny with cream on your face."
"Heh, thanks. So how's it been lately?"
"Nothing much. Classes are the same, some hard, some not. The onsen is busy sometimes, but Anna-san likes it that way. Yoh-kun does most of the work, including the cleaning. And Manta helps around sometimes too."
"I bet Anna makes him." Horohoro said and Tamao smiled with a slight nod. She never liked to speak ill of Anna, or anyone at all. Horohoro just laughed, not even surprised that some things haven't changed.
"So how's it been with you?"
"Uh...not much." Horohoro answered. He brought up some stories about the funniest embarassing moments that happened in class that he's seen, some of which happened to him. And he went on with the craziest things he's witnessed at parties, some of them even he's amazed they got away with. Or at least he did. And Tamao listened through it all in fascinated interest, laughing most of the time as she did. All in all, they were having a great time.
However, the pink haired girl didn't ask her question for the conversation to go this way. When she asked How's it been with you?, she was really asking How have you been since you and Ren broke up? and that also meant What happened?. She thought he'd understand, and he possibly did, but he was able to smoothly bring the subject in a different direction. She wished she could be more straight forward with what she wanted to say instead of always being so bottled up. But then again, she didn't want to make things uneasy when they haven't seen each other for so long. And remembering Horohoro calling it a date just made it harder, especially since she still had feelings for him.
"Tamao? Are you there?"
"Eh?" Tamao looked blank as she returned to Horohoro. She actually was listening, but somehow she pulled out her thoughts she had at the back of her head and went a bit too deep without realizing it. She looked at him apologetically and sank in her chair a bit. But Horohoro smiled like he was unbothered.
"It's alright."
"Gomen-nasai. What did you say?"
"Are you good with biology? I don't get more than half the stuff we're doing.
"Maybe because you sleep half the time?"
"Hm...maybe."
"You don't get enough sleep with all the fun you're always having." Tamao said scoldingly but Horohoro just rolled his eyes.
"So could you help me?"
"Sure, but I'm helping, not giving answers."
"Fine fine. When can we start?"
"When are you open?"
"How about tomorow? I gotta get a lot done before we get into something new."
"Alright, then meet me at the library tomorow after classes." The two decided to leave once the plan of tutoring was set. Horohoro payed for the cakes and tea and walked Tamao home. They said their goodbyes, and Tamao went to her room and sighed when she sat down on her bed. She had fun, she honestly did. But she was disappointed that in the end she couldn't find out what happened between Ren and Horohoro. But at the same time, she missed moments like today. It took her so long to get over Yoh. She wondered if she'd ever get over Horohoro. Especially now that she had a chance.
Chapter 8: Broken
As planned, Horohoro met Tamao at the library for some biology tutoring. And thanks to it, he caught up with his class and didn't get lost when they reached a new topic the next week. However, the Ainu revealed to the pink haired girl of the other subjects he had trouble with. And time to time he'd see her for places he got stumped at. But Tamao didn't mind helping him out, and they'd sometimes go to his or her house to study. And there were even times when the girl would have troubles and Horohoro would help her. Indeed, they spent a lot of time helping each other out, and it went on for a month.
But they didn't just meet for studying. They'd have lunch together and sometimes they'd go somewhere like ice cream. But usually it would be Horohoro that invited Tamao. And sometimes she'd try out new recipes and have Horohoro be the judge. Much went on between the two for a month. And all through it, Ren hasn't seen Horohoro.
It worried Ren to not see the Ainu for so long. He'd sometimes worry that something happened to him, and frequently watched the news. However, he has been secretly searching. Hao was finally giving him some space, agreeing that they shouldn't have to stick like glue. However, Ren was still on his toes, just to be on the safe side. There could always be someone from SOF watching where he can't see, and the Chinese at least knew better than to really believe that Hao was fully trusting him. Not with the way he reads people. On top of all that, he didn't know where to find Horohoro. Going to his house was too risky, and besides, the Ainu was rather the type to go out a lot. All of this discouraged Ren but he kept trying. But as he tried, a few of his teachers have been worried about his work which have been either turned in late, forgotten, or done too poorly for someone as achieving as Ren. And the Chinese wasn't willing to tell them, since he really couldn't, and so the unaware professors and teachers would nag at him. But today he was lectured by one of his most unfavored professors, who went on and on about how all this could really threaten his grades. Honestly, Ren couldn't care less of his grades right now, it's the last thing he needs to worry about. And when the teacher was finally done, there was barely anyone in the hall. Ren, with a stromy mood, walked down the seemingly empty hall and was about to turn a corner.
"Have you heard about Horohoro and Tamao?" Ren stopped and hid behind the wall. Usually he wouldn't care at all for gossip but this one was different. It was a girl, one he didn't know, and she seemed to be talking to another girl.
"Heard what?"
"That they're going out."
"Are you serious? Since when?"
"A while ago, a month I think."
"You sure it's true?"
"I think so. They've been seen together a lot. I've seen them a few times too. And I once saw them at that new cake store, and I think it was a date."
"They make such a cute couple!" Ren then stepped out of his hiding spot and walked passed the two girls in a brisk pace. He's heard enough and didn't need anymore.
A WEEK LATER
For a week Ren couldn't think straight or anything since he overheard the conversation. He regretted doing all those things to push away Horohoro and now he might have succeeded. Yes, it was intentional but it was to keep the bluenette safe until he found a way out of this. Now it might be too late if he really did move on. But already? He was so persistent and now he might be with Tamao? Ren bit down on his lip. Maybe...this is how he felt. Maybe this is...for the best? Ren shook the last thought out of his head. Hao was off somewhere with SOF and he stayed at home for the weekend, needing some time to think everything through. But it did no good, going outside might be better.
Unaware of Ren's troubles, Horohoro was on another date, as he called it. It made it harder for Tamao to ask anything about him and Ren, and it made her feel selfish and a bit ashamed. Especially when she's enjoying all his company. And today, they went to the mall for a sale. Tamao really asked Anna to come, but she declined and Horohoro volunteered when he heard. She couldn't say she wasn't delighted. However, neither of them thought the place would be so packed with people. It was probably impossible to get everything you wanted. Horohoro offered half jokingly that they hold hands so as to not lose each other. Turning beet red, Tamao said she'll be fine and politely declined. How wrong she was. One hour in the place and they lost sight of each other. And after thirty minutes of searching, just when panick was getting the best of Tamao, a hand took hers. She turned and was about to scream, but then sighed with relief.
"Alright, wether you like it or not, we're goin' with the buddy system." Tamao agreed, it's not like she didn't want to. The rest of the day she felt her best. When she saw their reflection in the display window, she couldn't supress her smile. They really did look like a couple. And they shopped until there was nothing more to shop for.
While Horohoro and Tamao shopped, Ren was out walking aimlessly to no particular destination. However, he soon noticed that he's brought himself to the mall. Finding no use of being there, he almost turned around. Until he saw Horohoro and Tamao walk out. Hand in hand. For a split second he froze, but quickly hid behind a tree. He took a small peek to see if he saw it right. Indeed, they were holding hands. But Horohoro let go and took the bags Tamao was holding. Ren hid again, this time until they were gone. He sat there for a long while, feeling as though something just shattered inside, and then walked wearily back to Hao's place.
Hao returned when it was late and dark out. He assumed that Ren was asleep since the lights were off and decided to check on him. He saw the Chinese laying down on his bed without the covers. He approached him quietly but was caught dumbfounded when he saw the eyes were open, showing melting gold glowing in the darkness. Hao made a smile and came to lie down next to him.
"Couldn't sleep?" Ren, staring at Hao with blank eyes, shook his head slowly. He did try to sleep, but what he saw that day seemed to be burned in his brain. And he could see it more clearly when he closed his eyes. Even if he did fall asleep, he knew a nightmare will wake him soon after.
"Lonely?" Hao whispered and brushed some of Ren's hair out of his eyes. Ren blinked at the question. Hao turned his body on his back and moved himself to loom above him. He wore a serious but soft exprеssion, not one that showed lustful hunger. But they both knew that he meant both love and lust. He took off his shirt and began to undo Ren's. The Chinese did nothing, sprawled on his back until he was open and completely vulnerable to Hao. The bruenette hovered over him and his hair curtained the sides of their heads.
"Is this why you love me?" Ren suddenly asked, breaking the delicate silence. Hao was dumbfounded once again. He really felt strange the whole way that Ren didn't resist what so ever. And the only thing he says is this? It seemed too easy or the change seemed too great. But Ren's face showed there was no wall and that he might actually be surrendering. The bruenette smiled and shook his head.
"Of course not. I love you." He murmured and came lower down. Ren still didn't seem to show resistance, which Hao considered good. "I just wish you could say the same to me. Could you, Ren? Could you say you love me?" Ren looked into Hao's dark eyes and opened his mouth. But nothing came out. Hao blinked and tilted his head but still nothing came from Ren. The Chinese looked away with a troubled exprеssion, knowing that he couldn't do it. Those three words still souly belonged to Horohoro and he couldn't give them to Hao or anyone else, without picturing the bluenette. Hao sighed, a bit disappointed. He put a hand to Ren's cheek and moved his face so their eyes would meet again.
"That's alright." He said and began to kiss down his neck. But Ren just lay there, staring up at the ceiling as Hao's hands skimmed his body. The bruenette stopped, unsatisfied by all this. There was no struggle, resistance, reaction, no mere reply at all. Though Ren is who he wanted, this wasn't it. Sighing again, he came next to the Chinese and brought him close, still holding his smile.
"No need to rush, we've made a lot of progress. You practically are mine." He said and sealed their lips. Ren kept himself there and closed his eyes. That way, it wasn't Hao but Horohoro's face he saw. Maybe this really is all he has left.
Tamao stood alone as she waited nervously, feeling like her heart could jump out of her. And her fingers fidgeted to keep her from pacing. She wished she hadn't come so early. She thought it would help her get ready but it seems to be doing the opposite. She took another deep breath to calm down, but it didn't really help.
"Tamao!" The called girl looked up and could already feel herself blush. Horohoro came running over and panted for air when he stopped. She couldn't turn back now. Once the bluenette finally caught his breath, he looked at her with his big grin.
"Was I late?"
"Um, n-no."
"Cool, I'm actually on time for something. So what'd you wanna talk about?" Tamao forced a giggle even though she felt like her stomach was twisted. She really didn't know how to start so it was best to just say it.
"Horohoro-kun, I, um I..."
"What's up, Tamao?"
"I-I...um...I...I love you!" After so much stuttering, which embarassed her too much, Tamao quickly told her message. She suddenly felt uplifted but immediately felt another weight fall on her. Horohoro stood dumbfounded, stunned at her sudden confession. And then he looked bewildered, and Tamao's heart began to sink deeply.
"I thought you loved Yoh."
"You're my closest friend who's a boy, and always comforted and made me happy when I was crushed about Yoh-kun. I eventually got over him, or rather say gave him up, but then I realized..." Tamao's cheeks turned redder and Horohoro's turned a bit pink. But he couldn't quite give an answer. That hurt Tamao a bit and she held back tears. Right before those tears fell, Horohoro spoke again.
"Three days."
"Eh?"
"Give me three days. I'll answer you then, I promise."
"...Ok." And so, Horohoro thought about it for those three days. His heart is what made him so lost. He loved Ren, not Tamao, and would choose the Chinese over her. So why didn't he? Because he was scared. Though he didn't really love Tamao, it was true that she's the closest friend out of every girl he knew. He at least knew that she loved him so choosing her wouldn't really be a bad thing. While Ren on the other hand, he didn't know if the Chinese loved him back. Choosing Ren would mean taking a chance. A risk to being broken. And who knows, maybe by giving Tamao a chance, Horohoro might grow to love her back. And so, three days later...
"Tamao?"
"Yes, Horohoro-kun?"
"I'm...sorry. I can't"
Horohoro leaned back on a tree as he looked back on that time, about two years ago. For a while, he thought about going to Tamao. For a while, it seemed right. But then the night before meeting her again, he realized it's wrong. It happened when he thought about Tamao's placement. He soon saw that she was somewhere he was trying to run from. Unlike him who was trying to go the easy way out, Tamao was facing her fear. Like him, she knew well of the chance of rejection. But still, she confronted Horohoro with her true feelings and didn't try to run away with dishonesty. And though he knew he was going to hurt her, Horohoro turned her down. But his eyes were opened to do what Tamao did; comfront Ren with his heart.
"Horohoro-kun!" Horohoro was quickly pulled out of his deep thoughts as Tamao came to him.
"Gomen-nasai. Did I make you wait?" The girl asked apologetically. But Horohoro smiled in return.
"Nah, not at all."
XxXxXx AT THE CAKE PLACE XxXxXx
The two sat at a table with cake in front of both of them. Tamao ordered a piece of chocolate cake and so did Horohoro along with cheese cake, strawberry short cake, and apple pie. As they ate, Tamao couldn't help but giggle at how excitedly Horohoro munched down. His child-like manner was always so cute, she couldn't resist. Plus, it always made her feel rewarded when he ate like that with food she cooked for him. Those moments highlighted even her darkest days.
"Did I do something funny?" Horohoro asked as he paused from eating and looked at Tamao. She shook her head in answer and held back giggles when she noticed a bit of cream at the corner of his mouth. She grabbed a napkin and gently wiped if off.
"No, but you look funny with cream on your face."
"Heh, thanks. So how's it been lately?"
"Nothing much. Classes are the same, some hard, some not. The onsen is busy sometimes, but Anna-san likes it that way. Yoh-kun does most of the work, including the cleaning. And Manta helps around sometimes too."
"I bet Anna makes him." Horohoro said and Tamao smiled with a slight nod. She never liked to speak ill of Anna, or anyone at all. Horohoro just laughed, not even surprised that some things haven't changed.
"So how's it been with you?"
"Uh...not much." Horohoro answered. He brought up some stories about the funniest embarassing moments that happened in class that he's seen, some of which happened to him. And he went on with the craziest things he's witnessed at parties, some of them even he's amazed they got away with. Or at least he did. And Tamao listened through it all in fascinated interest, laughing most of the time as she did. All in all, they were having a great time.
However, the pink haired girl didn't ask her question for the conversation to go this way. When she asked How's it been with you?, she was really asking How have you been since you and Ren broke up? and that also meant What happened?. She thought he'd understand, and he possibly did, but he was able to smoothly bring the subject in a different direction. She wished she could be more straight forward with what she wanted to say instead of always being so bottled up. But then again, she didn't want to make things uneasy when they haven't seen each other for so long. And remembering Horohoro calling it a date just made it harder, especially since she still had feelings for him.
"Tamao? Are you there?"
"Eh?" Tamao looked blank as she returned to Horohoro. She actually was listening, but somehow she pulled out her thoughts she had at the back of her head and went a bit too deep without realizing it. She looked at him apologetically and sank in her chair a bit. But Horohoro smiled like he was unbothered.
"It's alright."
"Gomen-nasai. What did you say?"
"Are you good with biology? I don't get more than half the stuff we're doing.
"Maybe because you sleep half the time?"
"Hm...maybe."
"You don't get enough sleep with all the fun you're always having." Tamao said scoldingly but Horohoro just rolled his eyes.
"So could you help me?"
"Sure, but I'm helping, not giving answers."
"Fine fine. When can we start?"
"When are you open?"
"How about tomorow? I gotta get a lot done before we get into something new."
"Alright, then meet me at the library tomorow after classes." The two decided to leave once the plan of tutoring was set. Horohoro payed for the cakes and tea and walked Tamao home. They said their goodbyes, and Tamao went to her room and sighed when she sat down on her bed. She had fun, she honestly did. But she was disappointed that in the end she couldn't find out what happened between Ren and Horohoro. But at the same time, she missed moments like today. It took her so long to get over Yoh. She wondered if she'd ever get over Horohoro. Especially now that she had a chance.
Chapter 8: Broken
As planned, Horohoro met Tamao at the library for some biology tutoring. And thanks to it, he caught up with his class and didn't get lost when they reached a new topic the next week. However, the Ainu revealed to the pink haired girl of the other subjects he had trouble with. And time to time he'd see her for places he got stumped at. But Tamao didn't mind helping him out, and they'd sometimes go to his or her house to study. And there were even times when the girl would have troubles and Horohoro would help her. Indeed, they spent a lot of time helping each other out, and it went on for a month.
But they didn't just meet for studying. They'd have lunch together and sometimes they'd go somewhere like ice cream. But usually it would be Horohoro that invited Tamao. And sometimes she'd try out new recipes and have Horohoro be the judge. Much went on between the two for a month. And all through it, Ren hasn't seen Horohoro.
It worried Ren to not see the Ainu for so long. He'd sometimes worry that something happened to him, and frequently watched the news. However, he has been secretly searching. Hao was finally giving him some space, agreeing that they shouldn't have to stick like glue. However, Ren was still on his toes, just to be on the safe side. There could always be someone from SOF watching where he can't see, and the Chinese at least knew better than to really believe that Hao was fully trusting him. Not with the way he reads people. On top of all that, he didn't know where to find Horohoro. Going to his house was too risky, and besides, the Ainu was rather the type to go out a lot. All of this discouraged Ren but he kept trying. But as he tried, a few of his teachers have been worried about his work which have been either turned in late, forgotten, or done too poorly for someone as achieving as Ren. And the Chinese wasn't willing to tell them, since he really couldn't, and so the unaware professors and teachers would nag at him. But today he was lectured by one of his most unfavored professors, who went on and on about how all this could really threaten his grades. Honestly, Ren couldn't care less of his grades right now, it's the last thing he needs to worry about. And when the teacher was finally done, there was barely anyone in the hall. Ren, with a stromy mood, walked down the seemingly empty hall and was about to turn a corner.
"Have you heard about Horohoro and Tamao?" Ren stopped and hid behind the wall. Usually he wouldn't care at all for gossip but this one was different. It was a girl, one he didn't know, and she seemed to be talking to another girl.
"Heard what?"
"That they're going out."
"Are you serious? Since when?"
"A while ago, a month I think."
"You sure it's true?"
"I think so. They've been seen together a lot. I've seen them a few times too. And I once saw them at that new cake store, and I think it was a date."
"They make such a cute couple!" Ren then stepped out of his hiding spot and walked passed the two girls in a brisk pace. He's heard enough and didn't need anymore.
A WEEK LATER
For a week Ren couldn't think straight or anything since he overheard the conversation. He regretted doing all those things to push away Horohoro and now he might have succeeded. Yes, it was intentional but it was to keep the bluenette safe until he found a way out of this. Now it might be too late if he really did move on. But already? He was so persistent and now he might be with Tamao? Ren bit down on his lip. Maybe...this is how he felt. Maybe this is...for the best? Ren shook the last thought out of his head. Hao was off somewhere with SOF and he stayed at home for the weekend, needing some time to think everything through. But it did no good, going outside might be better.
Unaware of Ren's troubles, Horohoro was on another date, as he called it. It made it harder for Tamao to ask anything about him and Ren, and it made her feel selfish and a bit ashamed. Especially when she's enjoying all his company. And today, they went to the mall for a sale. Tamao really asked Anna to come, but she declined and Horohoro volunteered when he heard. She couldn't say she wasn't delighted. However, neither of them thought the place would be so packed with people. It was probably impossible to get everything you wanted. Horohoro offered half jokingly that they hold hands so as to not lose each other. Turning beet red, Tamao said she'll be fine and politely declined. How wrong she was. One hour in the place and they lost sight of each other. And after thirty minutes of searching, just when panick was getting the best of Tamao, a hand took hers. She turned and was about to scream, but then sighed with relief.
"Alright, wether you like it or not, we're goin' with the buddy system." Tamao agreed, it's not like she didn't want to. The rest of the day she felt her best. When she saw their reflection in the display window, she couldn't supress her smile. They really did look like a couple. And they shopped until there was nothing more to shop for.
While Horohoro and Tamao shopped, Ren was out walking aimlessly to no particular destination. However, he soon noticed that he's brought himself to the mall. Finding no use of being there, he almost turned around. Until he saw Horohoro and Tamao walk out. Hand in hand. For a split second he froze, but quickly hid behind a tree. He took a small peek to see if he saw it right. Indeed, they were holding hands. But Horohoro let go and took the bags Tamao was holding. Ren hid again, this time until they were gone. He sat there for a long while, feeling as though something just shattered inside, and then walked wearily back to Hao's place.
Hao returned when it was late and dark out. He assumed that Ren was asleep since the lights were off and decided to check on him. He saw the Chinese laying down on his bed without the covers. He approached him quietly but was caught dumbfounded when he saw the eyes were open, showing melting gold glowing in the darkness. Hao made a smile and came to lie down next to him.
"Couldn't sleep?" Ren, staring at Hao with blank eyes, shook his head slowly. He did try to sleep, but what he saw that day seemed to be burned in his brain. And he could see it more clearly when he closed his eyes. Even if he did fall asleep, he knew a nightmare will wake him soon after.
"Lonely?" Hao whispered and brushed some of Ren's hair out of his eyes. Ren blinked at the question. Hao turned his body on his back and moved himself to loom above him. He wore a serious but soft exprеssion, not one that showed lustful hunger. But they both knew that he meant both love and lust. He took off his shirt and began to undo Ren's. The Chinese did nothing, sprawled on his back until he was open and completely vulnerable to Hao. The bruenette hovered over him and his hair curtained the sides of their heads.
"Is this why you love me?" Ren suddenly asked, breaking the delicate silence. Hao was dumbfounded once again. He really felt strange the whole way that Ren didn't resist what so ever. And the only thing he says is this? It seemed too easy or the change seemed too great. But Ren's face showed there was no wall and that he might actually be surrendering. The bruenette smiled and shook his head.
"Of course not. I love you." He murmured and came lower down. Ren still didn't seem to show resistance, which Hao considered good. "I just wish you could say the same to me. Could you, Ren? Could you say you love me?" Ren looked into Hao's dark eyes and opened his mouth. But nothing came out. Hao blinked and tilted his head but still nothing came from Ren. The Chinese looked away with a troubled exprеssion, knowing that he couldn't do it. Those three words still souly belonged to Horohoro and he couldn't give them to Hao or anyone else, without picturing the bluenette. Hao sighed, a bit disappointed. He put a hand to Ren's cheek and moved his face so their eyes would meet again.
"That's alright." He said and began to kiss down his neck. But Ren just lay there, staring up at the ceiling as Hao's hands skimmed his body. The bruenette stopped, unsatisfied by all this. There was no struggle, resistance, reaction, no mere reply at all. Though Ren is who he wanted, this wasn't it. Sighing again, he came next to the Chinese and brought him close, still holding his smile.
"No need to rush, we've made a lot of progress. You practically are mine." He said and sealed their lips. Ren kept himself there and closed his eyes. That way, it wasn't Hao but Horohoro's face he saw. Maybe this really is all he has left.
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22.11.2011 в 17:24